Smells Like Teen Spirit

The title of tonight’s episode of The Vampire Diaries has had me doing a lot of thinking. Not just about the episode (which I am VERY excited to see) but also about where the title came from. My guess is that 98% think immediately to the Nirvana song of the same title which is absolutely iconic of course! (If you’ve never heard the Tori Amos cover please seek it out. Also totally epic).

Anyways, the reality is that it’s about deodorant. More specifically, the very first deodorant made just for teens. And if you did not have this in the locker room at my Jr. High you may as well skip gym altogether. (I am totally aging myself aren’t I?) I think they still make this stuff but I want everyone to remember that it was created for a generation of teens who watched Saved By The Bell live on Saturday mornings and then had to travel to Blockbuster Music to stand in line for concert tickets. Perhaps those concert tickets were to see Nirvana live as well.

The senior class of Mystic Falls High really doesn’t have time for Saturday morning TV and if they wanted concert tickets they could purchase them from their phones. So, the question is, what will their anthem be and what will they remember about this time when they are ancient like me?

Here we are now. Entertain us.

TVD’s Midsummer Night’s Horror

Ok, I know it’s not midsummer but I have been thinking a lot about this since last week’s episode and the subsequent conversation I had with Tiff on Friday. The relationships on our favorite show have never been more complicated. And I mean NEVER. And since my opinions on the subject are SO important, I thought I’d break it all down and share with you all.

• Elena. Oh Elena. Clearly she loves Stefan. No doubt about that. But was his growling at her last week enough for her to be able to press pause until she can get him back from the dark side? (Personally I’d have jumped him right then and there just for that but, I digress). How will she feel once she learns about Rebekah? She knows there was Katherine and a playboy bunny or two before her but can she let slide a real ripper love affair?  And let’s not forget about the OTHER Salvatore. How IS she feeling about Damon these days? Will this break from the Save Stefan mission give her time to finally decide? Will Damon be willing to let her make the move, knowing that if Stefan were to return it would likely tear her in two? Is there even the possibility of happily ever after with Stefan’s loss hanging over both of them like rotting fruit?

• Speaking of Stefan. He loves Elena. He’s trying to keep her safe. Blah, blah, blah. We know all of that. But how does 2011 Stefan feel about Rebekah? Were his prior feelings fueled only by blood rage or was it something more? Can true love ever be compelled away? We all know the quote from the original books about Stefan and Elena finding each other regardless of the circumstances, but could that be true? If he was never made to forget Rebekah, would he have ever found Elena?

• Let’s address Stefan’s third lady in this situation (he certainly gets around). Miss Katherine. It’s quite clear now (to me) that she has true feelings of love for Stefan to this day and she wasn’t lying about stalking him all that time. At one point I could try and make the case that her feelings for him were gone but her little trek to Chicago has made that argument invalid. She wants him. Oh yes. But how much does she know about Rebekah? And how far is she willing to go to get her out of the way? Not sure that  it matters who she gets out of her way though. Stefan doesn’t love her. Not anymore. I think he has forgiven her for what she did to them but his love was that of an innocent boy which he has not been for a very long time. As opposed to Damon's love for her which took him through the greater part of a century and a half. Which leads me to:

• UNPOPULAR OPINION TIME!!!!! I think Damon and Katherine need to get over themselves and admit that they belong together forever. The kind of love Stefan and Elena want and need could never be provided by the likes of those two. They just aren’t built that way. Plus, who besides each other could keep up with their speedy wit and snarky quips for all eternity? Damon and Katherine are two sides of the same coin my dears and the faster they come to terms with that the happier they’ll be.

In closing: Elena loves Stefan and Stefan loves Elena but they can't be together right now. Damon also loves Elena but we don't know if how she really feels about him. Katherine loves Stefan and I imagine has lingering feelings for Damon but no one will admit to loving Katherine cuz she's an evil bitch. We think that Rebekah loves Stefan and that Stefan might love Rebekah but one shared neck is hardly enough to judge by.

What do you think friends? Did I get it right? Did I get it wrong? Do you have the answers to any of my burning questions? And lastly, IS IT THURSDAY YET?

My Summer Book Report: Supernatural Edition

The “Hellatus” between seasons 6 and 7 of Supernatural got to be a bit too much for me to handle this summer so I decided to fill as much time as I could scarfing up any and all Winchester bits I could get my hands on, including a few of the Supernatural novels. Something important to know about these books is that you DO need to be pretty familiar with the show before reading but you DO NOT need to be familiar with any of the other novels released before or after the one you’re about to indulge in. You also DO NOT need to read the books to keep up with the show. They are simply previously unseen adventures that, for the most part, fit neatly between already aired episodes (also, the covers are very pretty to look at). A lot of you Supernatural fans may have already read every one of these novels and formed your own opinions (which I’d LOVE to hear! Please share!) but for those of you still thinking about giving them a try, here are a few of my (spoiler free) thoughts on a few that I’ve read.

Title: Coyote’s Kiss
Author:Christa Faust
Release Date: July 12, 2011
Timeline: Events of this novel take place between “Caged Heat” (6x10) and “Appointment in Sumara” (6x11)
Coyote’s Kiss is one of the latest of the Supernatural novels and also the first that I picked up. I was both anxious and apprehensive about diving in. Dean and a Souless Sam take on a case involving a monster they’ve never ganked (which fits right in with the rest of season 6) and a brand of hunter they’ve never experienced who leads them deep into Mexico with the goal of saving the world. Again. My strongest hope was that it wouldn’t venture too far off episode canon or too far away from the characters' voices. Some people watch Supernatural for the action, some for the eye candy, but I watch because I’ve fallen in love with who the Winchesters are. I have to admit I was pleasantly surprised. I imagine Souless Sam isn’t an easy character to write but he seemed pretty on point here. Not perfect by any means but I have few complaints. However, there were instances where I thought to myself, “Dean would NEVER say anything like that.” Mostly “chick flick” moments (come on. We all know Dean Winchester isn’t the touchy feel your feelings kind of butt kicker) but it didn’t happen often enough for me to throw the book out the window. For the most part I could clearly hear Jensen Ackles’ voice as if he himself were delivering Dean’s lines in a scene. The mythology was a little sloppy and confusing but engrossing overall. In the end I was able to over look the snags and really enjoy the ride.
Final grade: B-

Title: One Year Gone
Author: Rebecca Dessertine
Release Date: May 24, 2011
Timeline: Events of this novel take place between “Swan Song” (5x22) and “Exile on Main Street” (6x01)
I was especially excited to read this novel after reading the foreword by the Supernatural god himself, Eric Kripke as the book was written by his assistant. I wonder if Eric ever read the final book. Warning: I’m gonna get a little knit picky here. The individual(s) who edited this book need to be fired. There were countless wording, spelling and grammatical errors that just ripped me right out of the story time after time. The other issue, which not many others would ever have, is that it takes place in Salem. Where I live. Just a tiny bit of research or one glance at Google Maps would have saved me from so much aggravation. To give some credit, this was written to be a case that Dean and Souless Sam take on during the year they’re apart so they never actually have any interaction. Since the story of the Winchesters is all about their relationship, this tale would be next to impossible to tell for anyone. I do however want to point out that even without technical errors or difficult story lines, this book still would have probably made me mad. There was an incident on a pirate ship that was really fun to read and Souless Sam was detached, cold, & a bit scary. In other words: perfect. But Dean? Oh man. Aside from a few quiet moments where he mourned the loss of his brother, it was not even close. And the bits of his relationship with Lisa covered here were also pretty unbelievable. Not gonna lie. I wasn’t sad when it was over.
Final grade: D

Title: War of the Sons
Author: Rebecca Dessertine & David Reed
Release Date: August 31, 2010
Timeline: Events of this novel take place between “My Bloody Valentine” (5x14) and “Dead Men Don’t Wear Plaid” (5x15)
After reading One Year Gone I was a little nervous about taking on another of the Supernatural novels but my thirst for Winchester proved to be too much to resist. I worried for naught. War of the Sons was fun from the start. Their adventure took them to a time and place I’d never have guessed I’d love. Sam and Dean go on a mission to avert the apocalypse and, low and behold, find a bit of trouble along the way. What was great about it though was the character loyalty. The brother to brother dialogue was written true to voice as were their inner thoughts. Dean was actually very funny. Which at first I had a problem with considering how “My Bloody Valentine” left off. But once I thought about it, that’s how Dean is. He’s a survivor. He’ll allow himself a breakdown now and again and then it’s time to move on. He’s good at tucking bits of his misery away and getting on with the job. The pace, mythology and quick wit had me waiting on pins & needles when I had to be away from the book. A great way to fill the space before September 23rd.
Final grade: A

TVD Season 3 Questionnaire Extraordinaire

Wow you guys. We're almost there. Can you believe we survived yet another TVD free summer? Only a little over one day left to wait so I put together something to help pass the time! I asked some of my favorite fellow Vampire Diaries fans to fill me on what they've loved about the season 3 promotion and what they're most looking forward to in the coming weeks. Their answers are a delight to read and (if at all possible) have made me even more anxious for Thursday night to be here. Thomas Galvin (@thomascgalvin), Melissa Leaman (@onlymystory), Crissy Calhoun (@crissycalhoun), and Abby Graham (@AbbyGraham ), all decided to play my little time killing game. Be sure to follow each of them on Twitter to keep up with all of their amazing words and projects.

1. Favorite image from a TVD Video promo:
Thomas: Elena's mouth dropping open when Damon walks out of the shower, covered in soap suds. And is it just me, or did she look a little longer than necessary before turning away? No, it's not. That girl wants - nay, needs - a little Damon in her. Life. In her life.

I also really love that you can tell the difference between Nina Dobrev playing Elena and Nina Dobrev playing Katherine, even when she isn't talking. That girl has chops.

Melissa: Klaus whispering in Stefan’s ear. While my slash loving side totally ships Klefan, I also love the idea of there being a literal devil on his shoulder. We’ve all known for a while now that Stefan is constantly fighting his inner demon. The implications of a flesh and blood demon tempting him at every turn fascinates me.

Crissy: Stefan pulling Elena’s hair.

Abby: Klaus and the cake.

2. Favorite TVD promo poster and/or episode still:
Thomas: The paintings where the vampires are all holding fruit / ripped out hearts are fantastically well done. And seriously? How awesome is it that the people who run this show decided "pretty people holding ripped out hearts" was the best way to speak to their core demographic?

I have to say, though, that Stefan's poster is my favorite, just because it makes a promise: Stefan can be awesome. I've been really hard on him in the past, mostly because he's a giant girly-boy who contributes nothing except agreeing to whatever suicidal plan Elena has cooked up this week, but there are glimmers of hope there. The Ripper has a lot of potential, and it'll be fun to watch Paul Wesley have a character he can actually sink his teeth into.

And actually, if the promos are accurate, he's going to have entire sororities full of characters he can sink his teeth into.

Melissa: The pomegranate. I actually enjoy the entire fruit motif because symbolism and mythology are particular interests of mine. I went way too into the whole thing on my Tumblr page but I like the pomegranate best. It manages to factor into both Elena as a character and the show as a whole.

Crissy: Hmm, I try not to look at the stills because I am a huge spoilerphobe, but the ones where Matt and Jer were hanging out looking all serious and ridiculously handsome were a nice reminder of all the goodness to come.

Abby: The illustration-looking one that looks like an evil children's book cover.

3. What you’d most like to see happen in the Season 3 premiere:
Thomas: A lot of people didn't love the Season Two opener, because they didn't think enough happened. But it turned out that a ton of fantastic plots were established in those short forty-five minutes.

I'm of the opinion that you shouldn't break what works. I just want them to set the scene for all of the craziness that's going to happen over the next twenty-two episodes. We've got Stefan and Klaus, Damon and Elena, Caroline and Tyler, Jeremy and Bonnie and The Ghosts of Girlfriends Past, and Katherine, and... maybe Alaric will get to talk a few times? That would be neat.

Of course, if they wanted to yank the Dagger of Not Really Dying out of Elijah, I wouldn't cry about it.

Melissa: Since I know that Stefan won’t really be letting his ripper flag fly until later, I think I’d most like to see some touching scenes between Alaric, Elena and Jeremy. People say your real family is the people you choose and those three have been developing their own version of a family for a while. I’d like to see some evidence of the three depending on each other, even if they don’t realize it.

Crissy: Klefan.

Abby: Ripper. Stefan. I know he'll happen, it's just the thing I'm most excited about, to see how Paul Wesley will play it.

4. What you’d most like to see happen within the first 6 episodes of Season 3:
Thomas: Six episodes is probably long enough for the writers to get Stefan back to Mystic Falls, and possibly free of Klaus. It would be very interesting to see how the Salvatore dynamic changes when Damon is the most rational one... not because Damon mellowed out, but because Stefan is batshit crazy.

I would also love for them to do something interesting with Bonnie. I've hated on her even more than Stefan, but I'd be ecstatic if they'd just make proper use of her. Give her some emotional development besides "I hate vampires and get nose bleeds a lot. But don't worry, it's not from the cocaine, it's from the magic." I'm still kind of rooting for her to become a Dark-Willow-style Big Bad. I think she'd be a fantastic tragic hero.

Melissa: Obviously I’m thrilled for RIPPAH STEFAN and the Roaring 20s flashbacks. I always love this show so it’s hard to say what I most want to see. But I guess that Elijah is woken up, lots of Damon/Alaric road trip bonding clichés, tons of Anna and the beginning of a Matt story line.

Crissy: The rise of Elijah. (Actually I’m willing to wait a little longer to see that happen, as long as it does happen…)

Abby: Elijah: The Revenge

5. Which character do you think will offer the most surprises in Season 3?
Thomas: Stefan, just because I don't think people are used to seeing him as a bad guy. Even though we know it's coming, I think a lot of people are going to be shocked at how brutal The Ripper can be. And I really, really hope that's true.

Melissa: To me? I’m hoping Elena. I’d really like to see her go a bit darker. I think Matt’s going to be the Caroline of S3 though for most people. At the end of S1, the majority of fans hated Caroline and we’re hoping she wouldn’t make it through the premiere. Now of course, she’s one of the most beloved characters on the show. This time around, Matt seems to be in that boat but I know there’s not only so much more to the character but a wealth of talent in Zach. I can’t wait for this fandom to see that.

Crissy: Safe bet’s on Klaus, but I’m going to go with Elena.

Abby: Bonnie. I know that's a weird answer, but I think Kat Graham has more to offer the show than nosebleeds and moralizing, and I think the writers may be ready to show it.

6. Special predictions?
Thomas: Despite the troubled economy and a raft of failed promises, Obama will win a second term, largely because the American people are sick of the "political circus" in Washington.

Oh, you mean about TVD? Okay then.

I predict that there will be a Magic McGuffin that will cure Stefan of his Ripper tendencies, that Bonnie will be key in procuring said Plot Device, and that she will be emotionally conflicted over helping a vampire that has killed so many people. And then Damon will be all "STFU or GTFO," and she'll be like "okay fine, I'll help you this once," and Damon will be like "Witch please, you know you can't resist the eyebrows," and she'll be all like "you're right," and look at the ground like she's ashamed.

Melissa: Matt & Caroline will save Stefan while Elena & Elijah kill Klaus. Also, at some point, Katherine will have fun giving Damon & Alaric sexy dreams about each other.

Crissy: I’m terrible at guessing ahead — my only prediction is that we will not see it coming. Whatever “it” is.

Abby: None that come immediately to mind.

7. Your most burning TVD question:
Thomas: Not so much a question as a promise: if Caroline and Tyler have werepire puppies, I will walk to Atlanta and burn the set to the ground. Nothing says "jump that shark" like magic babies.

Though I guess you could turn that into a question. Like, "what kind of accelerant should you use to burn down an inexplicably empty high school?" Or "could they rebuild Caroline's house as fast as they repaired the Grill?" Or "where does Damon keep that flame thrower?"

Melissa: What is Mama Donovan and did Matt inherit some freaky gene from her?!

Crissy: The Original Petrova — who was she, why was she important enough to bind Klaus’s curse, and is she dead or undead?

Abby: None at the moment, I'm just waiting to see what will happen.

Just in case anyone reading this doesn't yet have September 15th tattooed on their foreheads yet, don't forget to watch the Season 3 premiere of The Vampire Diaries Thursday night at 8:00 PM EST on The CW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SDCC Run Down

I have no pictures or videos to share with you because I am SUPER awesome and left my memory card in San Diego. I am sure that, even if you saw them, you'd still think I was a loser. I don't care though, because I just spent almost an entire week at my HEAVEN!!!!!!! Here are my thoughts and thanks!!!

I did it. I got Comic-Con. I didn’t just go. I ROCKED it. I hit my panels, I hosted my bar night. I made friends, I met people. I BONDED with the best of the best. For the most part, I had the experience I set out to have. I handled my press situations without barf or fainting. I got to hug a number of ladies I have been in love with for AGES. I spent time with TONS of amazing people. Though I have to say, there were so many friends there, Billions of hours never would have been enough.

See my press coverage here: Jared Padalecki, Joseph Morgan, Paul Wesley

I thought the lines would be painful but I whiled away my time, talking about Firefly, Vampire Diaries, Bones, Buffy, Angel, Chuck, Dexter, True Blood, Supernatural, Friday Night Lights, Veronica Mars, EVERY OTHER SHOW I’VE EVER WATCHED!! I seriously got to talk about my TV shows non-fucking-stop for 4 days with super smart people who knew what the hell I was talking about!!!! I was partied to some amazingly cutting edge TV conversations, dirty jokes and insane inside scoop!!! Comic-Con was my heaven!! It was everything I wanted and then some. I miss it every day that I am not there. Though I know that “there” is already gone. One thing I know for sure, is that it would not have been possible without a little help from my friends. 

 A few thank yous!!!

For Bird – thanks for trying to keep up with me! I know my get up and go is an impossible thing. I'd never have made it without you and I wouldn’t have done it without you. Ever.More love than fits. 

For Tiff – Thanks for keeping my pace and for making me laugh SO many times!!! You kept me sane!!! And for the Driving! You’re a saint! I’d go with you ANYWHERE!

For Tash – Love you forever! Thanks for keeping it light and for always putting a smile on my face. You are a unicorn to me.

For Vee & Crissy – You both make being in the presence of greatness so much easier than it should be. Thank you for being so lovely, so warm and for making fangirling an art. I’m better for having met you. Love & Hugs!!

For Erin – I can’t even try to type anything that will make any sense. Your last hug is still with me like some kind of ghost. I love you. Never go back to OZ. Stay with me FOREVER.

For Natalie & Erin – I wish we would have had more time!!! Love you both. Can’t wait to see you again!!

For Candace – You have the sweetest soul. Never change. DON’T SCRATCH!!!! So Happy for you babe!!! Visit me often!! Love you lots!!!

Mel – No Mal?  No Dumbledore? I’m over it. Nothing but love babe!!!

Jen – Never thought I’d meet such a kind soul in such a place!!! You were a true breath of fresh air for me! Can’t wait to see you again! Happy belated birthday!

Carina – You are the only reason I made it through those press rooms without fainting OR barfing!! Thanks for being so cool. Thanks for showing me the ropes!!! You’re a sweetie!! Don’t let anyone say otherwise!!

Stacey - you'll never know how much you gave me. I'll be grateful for the rest of my life. Thank you, thank  you, thank you!!!! You changed my world!!! 

As far as Celebs go – Zach Levi gets my A+ Star of approval even though I personally never got the balls to ask for a photo or autograph. From the start of the Chuck panel to the end of the Jared thing, he was the classiest person within a hundred miles. He raised money, he hugged fans, he paid tribute to his show and acknowledged how hard we all worked to get Chuck a Season 5. I love that throughout SDCC, he was always out for the greater good. Wanna know how to be awesome: See Zach Levi in the dictionary.  Jared Padalecki and Paul Wesley were also A.Fucking.Mazing. Beautiful and awesome. I'll be forever grateful for their kindness.  

I'm sure I'll have more later. To summarize the entire weekend = WAY BEYOND FUCKING EPIC 

Interviewing Thomas Galvin Powers Activate!

If you're like me, Thomas Galvin (@thomascgalvin on Twitter) probably came into your lives via his always hysterically funny and brilliantly snarky Vampire Diaries recaps. I give him full credit for my love affair with recappers that bag on my favorite show. Thomas also blogs on a number of other topics with the same biting humor and collects goodies from around the web. His blog (Thomas-Galvin.com) has become a real internet highlight for me so be sure to check it out. In the mean time, while we are all painfully waiting for his next TVD recap, he answered some of my burning questions about the show he seems to love to hate!

How did you first find The Vampire Diaries? Are you a fan of the genre or was it completely by accident?
T: Yeah, I'm a huge fan of the genre, so Vampire Diaries was kind of a given for me. Buffy the Vampire Slayer is one of my favorite shows of all time, and while TVD is certainly different from Whedon's show, it kind of fills the same void in my life. The dark, empty void.

What about TVD made you want to recap it in your very distinct re-scripting manner?
T: Well, to start with, I'm neither the first nor the only person doing script-style recaps. Cleolinda Jones is probably the best known; she does a great series called Movies in Fifteen Minutes. Then, there's The Editing Room, and Frankie Diane Mallis, over at First Novels Club, who's actually recapping TVD. Anyway, the script style is just how I think... it's actually how I write a lot of my first drafts, too. I think dialog is the hardest part to get right, and doing a script-style treatment makes you work on it longer and harder (that's what she said). And it kind of forces you to do the whole "show, don't tell" thing. As for the blog... well, I'm basically a huge attention whore, and my sense of self-worth is directly proportional to the number of hits I get in a month.

If you were to regularly recap any other show on TV what would it be?
T: The second season of Firefly, because that show was taken too soon. Or maybe another season of Veronica Mars. But really, I think I've got as many shows on my plate as I can handle. In addition to TVD, I recap True Blood and, for some reason, Teen Wolf. That's a lot of hours in front of the television. A lot of people ask me to recap Supernatural. I love that show, but it would honestly be a nightmare to recap, because so much of it is already funny. I'd pretty much just be copying down their script every week.

You appear to have a real love affair (or not) with Bonnie Bennett. How did that start?
T: The show just doesn't know what to do with her. She's a witch for Odin's sake... she should be the most powerful character on the show. Instead, they have her floating feathers and lighting tiny fires with her tiny brain and almost-but-not-quite actually being useful in the fight with the Big Bad Werepire. And that stunt she pulls, where she seals people inside of a house while their lover dies at the hands of an ancient monster? That would send her straight to the top of my hit list. But one of the most frustrating things is that she could be a great character. When her Grams died, and she was so... broken and confused at her inability to bring her back? That was fantastic television, and for that one moment, I was Team Bonnie. But they didn't do anything with it... they just let all that character development fall right on the floor. And she was showing shades of Buffy's Evil Willow, and I'd love to see Bonnie go all Dark Side for a while. But it doesn't look like we'll be getting that, either. Instead, we get to watch an entire town die to keep her safe.

Is there a character in your personal TV watching history that you have loathed as much as Bonnie?
T: Half the cast of True Blood. Tara, Sam's Redneck Family, Voodoo Jesus... sweet lemony Moses that show needs to cut it with the side plots. I really hated Detective Tritter on House, too... but I was supposed to. Hating a character isn't necessarily a bad thing, when the show puts that hate to good use. But we know that Bonnie is that I know she isn't going to die, and we don't expect her character to go anywhere. She's not the antagonist, she's just an anchor.

We all know you're a big fan of Damon. Do you remember the first moment you joined the Damon team?
T: When he was reading Twilight, and talking about how whipped Edward was, I knew I'd found my soul mate. Although it really wasn't until he started becoming more of an anti-hero, as opposed to a straight-up villain, that he really started to click with me. There's something about the mix of "trying to do the right thing" and "completely unpredictable" that's fascinating. And, well, his penchant for walking around shirtless doesn't hurt...

If you could kill anyone off the show OTHER than Bonnie, who would it be and how would they die?
T: Well, there's no one that I really want to die, but I think it would be hilarious if Caroline ate Matt. Not out of rage or bloodlust or anything, just kind of... accidentally. Like when you come home and the cats have spilled kitten food all over the kitchen, except when Sheriff Forbes comes home, Matt's arterial spray is all over the... everything.

Favorite TVD show moment: 
T: Allow me to quote:
Super Damon ripping his goddamn heart out while hes still in the goddamn air and tossing it on the goddamn ground like it aint no goddamn thing because I am that. Goddamn. Awesome. Powers activate!
And then Jonas Martin walking out of the woods, head bowed and hands spread, throwing brain pain around like it ain't no thing. That whole scene was very well done. Also: Stefan teaching Caroline how to vampire? Adorable.

Favorite TVD episode:
T: I don't know that I have a favorite episode, per se, but my favorite development happened in Klaus (S02E19); when Elijah told Elena that the whole Sun and Moon curse what just a giant troll, I literally got off the couch and clapped. That whole thing was just so unrelentingly stupid, and when the writers/producers showed that they knew that it was stupid, and that they could fix it... respect.

What happens in your dream Season 3 episode of TVD?
T: Bonnie goes over to the dark side. Well, all the way over, since she's already guilty of a lot of morally questionable antics. She's always been a little touchy about the Salvatore brothers, but now that Stefan is in full-on ripper mode, I want to see her declare war on them. Given the way this show burns through plot twists, I expect Klaus to be dealt with by episode 12 at the latest, and I want Bonnie to be the one who takes him down... and replaces him as the Big Bad in Mystic Falls. That would give us a situation where the Salvatores wanted to kill her, Elena wanted to save her, and it makes sense.

Message for the TVD Fans: 
T: Loooooooook into my eyes...

Interview with Supernatural Super Fan Site - SuperWiki

I’m still pretty new to the Supernatural fandom. I actually just finished a few of weeks ago. 6 seasons in 12 days (I still believe I may have broken some records there). One thing is for certain though; I fell in love with this show and with this fandom right away. There is so much passion. And it’s easy to see why. So when I asked my fellow Supernatural fans to recommend the very best to follow, I got an overwhelming response of “SUPERWIKI!” And even though they are busy keeping fans up to date with daily awesomeness, they were kind enough to answer some questions for me!

A few SuperWiki facts - It began life as a website called Super Canon in early 2006, and became the Supernatural Wiki in August 2006. In the last 12 months there have been over 3 million visits to the SuperWiki.  In the first three years the site was run by a group of five fans from around the world. In the last couple of years, the main administrator has been Jules Wilkinson (@missyjack on Twitter) who also runs the @SuperWiki twitter (be sure to follow them for all the latest news and goings on in the world of SPN), with Hope who founded the site running the technical side the operation. Any fan can take part in adding content or editing the site. The coding is easy and there are pretty simple guidelines to follow to make sure the site stays accurate and user friendly. Be sure to check it out if you don’t live there already!

What was it about Supernatural that moved you to put so much personal time/work into the site?

Jules:An awesome Show and a wonderful fandom – and I love that the SuperWiki covers both of them. The Show itself is so packed with details - from classic horror movies or 80s TV shows to folklore and Greek mythology, to meta references and all the wonderful details in the sets. It's a show that’s not afraid to be intellectual one moment and then roll around in pop culture and porn the next.

I love decoding these, and being able to share that information with other fans, who can get even more out of the show if they understand a reference. As the audience of the show has spread around the world, this became even more important as things that will be familiar to American audiences - like references to certain products or ads – won't be recognised in other countries.  Supernatural is such a quintessential American story, so that understanding these things is important. And I should know – I'm Australian!

It's great being able to share the wonders of fandom with new fans. It can be hard to know where to start with such a diverse and large fandom, which has its own history and slang and in-jokes.  I hope the SuperWiki can be a bit of a guide if you’re trying to work out what Wincest is or where to find great podfic.

I also love that the SuperWiki is proud of our fandom – it celebrates the achievement of fans and the amazing things we write and create, the projects we undertake and the websites we make. I know lots of fans use the SuperWiki as a resource when creating things too which is great. And Keith R.A. DeCandido mentioned the Supernatural Wiki as a resource he used in the acknowledgements of the first two Supernatural novels.

Plus I get to do important work - like documenting all of Bobby's hats! 

You have a very open format and there is a lot of negativity out there. How do you maintain the site as a place of love for the SPN fandom?

Jules:I like to think of our fandom as passionate rather than negative. Sera Gamble – who is a long time Trekkie herself – said "fandom is defined by meticulous care and really giving a shit and having strong opinions and arguing."

That said, the SuperWiki has had an amazingly calm history. We have had less than a handful of arguments between people on the site in five years, and they have generally been about interpretations of facts – like what creatures the Colt can kill, or where Lucifer's Cage is located.

A large part of this has been because the SuperWiki has fans from all parts of fandom involved. The SuperWiki is awesome because of this diversity, and I think fans really value that and it means we all feel a sense of ownership of it. 

What has been your most rewarding moment of running the site?

Jules: Really, it's being part of such a huge creative community project. I feel proud that our fandom has created this amazing rich resource – that many others envy! Being part of making that happen is a real privilege.

 
Supernatural seems to do a lot of conventions. Have any of you attended? If so, what can you tell newbies about it? Should we go or not?

Jules: What I think is awesome about the conventions is that it gives fans a chance to build the friendships we've created on line and share our passion. And the amazing thing is how that has spilled over to the actors. We've seen friendships develop between actors – like Misha and Matt Cohen – who never even appeared in a scene together.

I have been to the couple of Cons held in Australia, which are very small compared to most. I have been to Wincon in the US four times and had the best times of my life. Wincon is a fan run Con, which is just for fans and like a crazy four day party with panels, workshops and even a Prom. (check it out at www.omgwincon.com)

Supernatural is famous for its Classic Rock Soundtrack. What song from SPN has been your favorite so far and why?

Jules: I can't go past "Carry On Wayward Son" by Kansas. It's such a perfect song for the show. Of course it first played in Season One at the opening of Salvation, but it was when it played in the finale of Season Two I thought "Yes – we have a theme song!" And there have been many occasions now when I've sung it with a group of fangirls in karaoke, or on the dance floor at Wincon which is the most magnificent feeling!

Favorite NON Winchester Character:

Jules: I'll warn you know – I hate picking favourites!

Well Bobby and Castiel are family – so they're really Winchesters aren't they? As is the Impala of course.

I adore Crowley, and love that we have a recurring gay demon on the show, and Gabriel stole every scene he was in. But I'll have to pick Ruby as my favourite. I loved her snarkiness and deviousness and the fact that for two years she really kept us guessing as to what she was up to. 

Favorite episode:

Jules: All of them?

Okay I'll pick three.

Lazarus Rising: It is a brilliant episode on so many levels. It kicks the whole mythology up a notch, and is packed with so much plot and great character moments including the rare Winchester hug! It opens with that wonderful four minute silent sequence, it has some great OMG moments -- like Sam using his powers, and of course Castiel's entrance which is simply stunning. The direction by Kim Manners is particularly fantastic.

Swan Song: I still find this an incredibly emotional episode to watch. It distils out the essence of the show in Sam and Dean's relationship, wraps up 5 years of story and it had our beloved Impala at the centre. And Chuck turns out to be God.

The French Mistake: Supernatural has taken on doing meta like no other show. It's hilarious, its thinky and it takes a huge amount of skill to pull off. An episode like this is only possible because of the intimate relationship between the fans and the cast and crew which really says a lot about both the show and the fandom.

Favorite SPN show moment:

Jules: Seriously? There's about 4,657 moments on my favourites list!

Okay – the flashback in A Very Supernatural Christmas, when we find out that Sam gave Dean his amulet.

Favorite SPN Blooper moment (we all know and love these moments so much how can I not ask?):

Jules: All of the Season Two gag reel! Jared splitting his pants, the classic Kim Manners prank, the rock/paper/scissors moment between Jared and Jensen – classic!

Hopes for the future of Supernatural:

Jules: At this point I am confident the Show will continue as long as those involved want to make it. It would be fantastic if we could have a Supernatural movie though!

Message for the SPN Fandom:

Jules: Keep on being the most awesome fandom there is! And hopefully we can help survive Hellatus together.

Supernatural - This is the End - Season 6 Review

Well friends. That’s it. I have crossed the finish line of this marathon. There is no more (at least until September). 126 episodes in 12 days. That averages out to more than 10 episodes a day. Nearly 7 hours of Winchester goodness every day for almost 2 weeks. That has to be some kind of record right? Cannot even say how emotionally exhausted I feel right now. The most ginormous of THANK YOU’s to those of you who have gone on this ride with me. And my GOD what a ride!! Couldn’t have done it without my faithful friends following my journey here and on Twitter. Open yourselves a beer and indulge in a delicious bacon cheese burger with me. You’ve earned it!

Moving on. So. Season 6. Hmmmm….. I felt like I was watching the entire thing sitting on egg shells. Maybe if I don’t make any sudden movements, maybe if I keep quiet and shut my eyes everything will be just fine. I had not one bit of trust for anyone but Dean. For 22 episodes I was looking over my shoulder and checking to make sure I still had my wallet. Anyone else?

I knew immediately what was wrong with Sam. I tried to complicate it for myself (because that is just what I do. With everything). But that first hug. I knew. And even when I was looking right at his face, I missed Sam. Mostly on Dean’s behalf of course. Mostly. In “You Can't Handle the Truth,” Lisa sums it up pretty perfectly: “You two have the most unhealthy, tangled up, crazy thing that I’ve ever seen.” So true. But that is what we love right? In the season opener I thought I understood why Sam would come back and not go to Dean. Before he went to hell, it was so important to Sam that Dean get that life that had always seemed so out of reach. I understood it but I was still so fucking pissed. Pissed and confused. No matter what, our Sam would never be able to NOT be a part of Dean’s life.

Dean’s post Sam life, as happy as it seemed, for those looking through unknowing eyes, was not what Dean was meant for. The opening montage in “Exile on Main St.” was so beautiful and still so heart breaking. Even with everything, Dean has nothing without his brother. (Please tell me I am not the only one who held her breath until she knew the Imapala was safe and still in Dean's care?) That Sam stuff said, it doesn’t make any of the Ben and Lisa loss any easier to handle. The woman tried so hard, put up with so much (wouldn’t you for that man?) but she is only human. And of course Dean, in the end ("Let It Bleed"), feels like he must sacrifice every bit of himself for those he loves. The conversation that takes place in the hospital after Cas saves Lisa’s life and cleanses their memories of her and Ben’s life with Dean, blaming the whole thing on a car crash, was one of the most difficult things I have witnessed on this show of endless pain. The crying was loud. And I actually thought I might stop breathing for a minute.

Ben: Who are you?
Dean: I'm the... uh, the guy who hit you.
Lisa: Oh.
Dean: I just, I lost control for a minute. And I just wanted to say that I'm sorry. I'm really happy you two are both okay. And, uh, I'm glad your life can get back to normal now.
Lisa: We're okay. So, so that's what's important, right?
Dean: Yeah. Anyway, I'll leave you two alone. You take care of your mom.

The double meaning behind everything he said just laid me out as if I myself were the one hit by a car. He is so unable to allow himself any happiness. It makes my soul ache.

This season wasn’t all tears and nervous scratching though. “Weekend at Bobby’s,” was super fun. I am such a giant fan of his. I loved getting to see the story from his perspective for once. And cheers to Jensen on his directorial debut. It was an amazing episode. “Clap Your Hands If You Believe...,” was brilliant of course. The Fairies and Dean were a perfect combination. And Sam’s soullessness was actually fucking awesome for once, which I never would have expected. In “The French Mistake,” the show confronted their fandom once again. I wish every show would be this self aware. I had tears streaming down my face from laughing so hard. And, of course, “Frontierland.” Dean’s enthusiasm alone put a smile on my face throughout the entire thing.

So now it’s on to Season 7. Cas is God? Do you think the guy maybe got a bit ahead of himself? Perhaps a little power hungry? I totally get what he set out to do but the boy just got a bit carried away didn’t he? I can’t wait to see how this will affect Sam and Dean. Dean was right to question him and mistrust him but now I am afraid that Cas is going to make him pay for that. Dean has to pay for everything. How this man isn’t a broken, busted, messy puddle on the floor by now just shows the strength of his character, of his soul. It illustrates just why I love him the way that I do. Speaking of busted, messy puddles, what can we expect from Sam? He seemed ok for those 6 seconds we saw him post full Hell memory retention. But we all know that can’t last. Will Season 7 be more of watching him through suspicious eyes? I cannot wait to find out!!! Also, real quick, anyone else as worried about the Impala as I am? FREAKING OUT! Dean can fix it. Right? *pray, hope, wish*

I have enjoyed all of your comments on these Supernatural posts more than I can say. Please feel free to continue with the Winchester love and tell me what you thought of Season 6!! I hang on every word!

Also, before I move on to my next show, I want to re-watch 10 episodes of Supernatural just so that I can move on properly. It is extremely important that I have your vote on which 10 those should be. HELP ME OUT!






*Screencap credits to http://supernaturalfansonline.com/

Supernatural - Season 5 Review

And Season 5 is dead and buried. I must be making some kind of record. 5 seasons in 7 days. I told a friend on twitter that Supernatural is worse than crack. Not that I’ve ever smoked crack. But I imagine it feels very much like this. The more you have, the more you want. And friends, I WANT.

However, I did learn my lesson from my last post. I will not be going episode by episode this time. I won’t do that to my loyal readers again. No more novels from this girl. So sorry about that. Though, if you love this show half as much as I do, I am sure you understand. For this season, just a few highlights and thoughts to share. I'll keep it as brief as possible. (Sweating from the stress).

This season, for me, was all about redemption, faith and home. Redemption for Sam. He wanted and needed it so badly. Honestly I have mixed feelings about the way Dean treated Sam throughout the season. Yes. Sam really fucked up. Not just “oops I made a mistake” but seriously fucked up beyond fixing. He started the fricking apocalypse for frak sakes! So I kind of get Dean being unable to trust him. Sam had lied. Had gone against everything Dean had taught him growing up. For Dean it must have been worse than any beating he’d ever taken. But Dean has to remember, he’s no saint. He played his part in getting the ball rolling. And Sam was so sorry. Not that “sorry” can undo anything. But Sam’s remorse was so strong and true. And of course losing faith in Sam led Dean to lose Faith in everything. Faith in humanity, in his family, in himself. Dean just isn’t Dean without his self assuredness. Famine was right. Dean was dead inside. And to see it, to watch it unfold, was more tragic than anything. More tragic than Sam’s continued blood lust. Every time he was near the stuff I was yelling aloud at my TV in the same voice I use for my 3 year old niece when she’s getting into something that she’s not supposed to touch.

The underlying home theme didn’t really register until the finale, which made me look back throughout the rest of the episodes. Because for the Winchester brothers, home is not a town or a building. It’s something else entirely. They were lost for a while, but they made it back there just in time.

The mythology this season was also a ton of fun. I love apocalypse stuff. Which seems really creepy typed out like that. But it was all very interesting to me. God and Lucifer. The angels and the demons. The Four Horsemen. I loved it. Actually makes me want to read Revelations again. And Dante’s Divine Comedy. I was especially fascinated by Dean’s conversation with Death in 5x21. I thought Death was really cool. I could have watched Death and Dean talk it out for days. I’m weird. It’s ok for you to think so. Also, I think I have become completely bipolar thanks to this show. All day every day laughing my head off or crying my brains out. About what you ask? Here goes:

What made me laugh until it hurt?

“I Believe the Children Are Our Future” – 5x6: That Tooth Fairy who “looks like Belushi” was HILARIOUS! And Dean’s hairy palms? Sam’s look of disgust? PRICELESS!

“The Curious Case Of Dean Winchester” – 5x7: I’m too lazy to look up his name but that guy playing old Dean did some serious research. He was magnificent. The fighting with Bobby killed me.
Sam: It's like Grumpy Old Men.
Old Dean and Bobby: Shut up, Sam!
And Sam got The Clap. Fantastic!

“Changing Channels” – 5x8: Aside from the faux Grey’s Anatomy stuff (which was hilarious) there was THIS. I honest to God thought I might pass out from laughing. I could have died you guys. For reals.

“The Real Ghostbusters” – 5x9: The moments when Supernatural incorporates the fandom into the show itself is so endearing and brilliant. Is there any other show with the balls to do this?

“Sam, Interrupted” – 5x11: These boys do crazy so well. “I don't have any elephant books.” *DEAD* And then there is THIS which kills me deader than dead. Pudding will never be the same.

“Swap Meat” – 5x12: That first sequence with Gary in the Sam suit had me convulsing with laughter. Jared just KILLED it. How he got through any of that with a printable take is beyond me. “Crystal, I would love to have the sex with you.”

Througout the season, the overall hilarity of Castiel’s inability to understand pop culture references (which Dean uses as he breathes) and his deadpan responses to such will bring joy to my heart for years to come:
Dean: Cherub?
Castiel: Yeah, they're all over the world. There are dozens of them.
Dean: You mean the little flying fat kids in diapers?
Castiel: They're not incontinent.

What made me bawl my damn eyes out?

“The Devil You Know – 5x1: The conversation between Sam and Dean at the end of this episode was so hard. Sam is so sorry and Dean is so disappointed. “I don’t think we could ever be what we were.” It’s heart crushing.

“Good God, Y'all” – 5x2: I hate, hate, hate that Dean gave up his necklace. Partly because the moment that it was given to him was one of the most touching for me. And partly because I just can’t stand to see him without it. Wanna know what else I hate? THE BROTHERS WINCHESTER SEPARATED! *SOB, SNIFFLE, TEARS*

“Free to Be You and Me” – 5x3: The opening montage of Sam and Dean going their separate ways is nearly impossible to watch without wracking sobs, all set perfectly to Lynyrd Skynyrd’s “Simple Man.” No matter what has happened, nothing is right unless they are together.

"The End” – 5x4: “We’re all we’ve got.” Would it have killed them to hug?

“Abandon All Hope” – 5x10: Such loss. I had wanted Jo and Dean to hook up since they were pretend together in “No Exit” (2x6). So, for me, the goodbye kiss on the forehead was hard. The goodbye kiss on the lips was agonizing.

“The Song Remains the Same” – 5x13: The conversations between Dean and their mom and especially between Sam and their dad were so much more than beautiful. Despite everything these boys have been through in their short lives, they still love and need their parents. So much.

“Dark Side of the Moon” – 5x16: There were a lot of moments in this episode that really broke me but none more so than Dean’s memory of fireworks with Sam. I was just sitting and watching, eating my breakfast. And then this scene came along and hit me like a ton of bricks. One second I was fine, the next I was rolled up in a ball with sobs shaking my entire body. I can’t even put my finger on exactly why it triggered me like that but it did. Maybe it was Dean’s first really real, happy smile in the longest time. Maybe seeing them as they should be. Please tell me in the comments that I was not the only one to spaz out like that. What a beautiful mess that was. And now every time I hear Bob Dylan’s “Knocking on Heaven’s Door,” people are going to want to know what’s wrong with my helplessly crying dumbass.

“Swan Song” – 5x22: Where do I even start? From “The Road So Far” to the closing credits I was a God Damned mess. Through the story of the Impala (I dare you to read and not break down); I learned all about what home really is. The Impala was their physical home and a symbolic home as well. But in spirit, when we’re talking souls, they were each other’s home. Where ever they were, together, they were home. And I feel that after so much time fighting and doubting and losing faith in each other, they were able to make it back there before the end. Dean refused to give up on Sam (“Rock of Ages” by Def Leppard will, from here forward, be my go to song for motivation) and when it came down to it, Sam came through (after the most spectacular montage ever created by humans, which was triggered, of course, by the magical Impala). Watching Satan in the Sam suit beat the shit out of Dean; while Dean continued to reach out to Sam (“I’m not going to leave you”) was so hard to watch that I feel I might be damaged for life. But, Team Free Will won the battle. Sam did what he set out to do. And Dean kept his promise. The entire thing was ridiculous in how gut stripping it was. It is ridiculous how shredded my heart and soul feel even hours later while writing this. I know their story isn’t over (judging by Sam’s showing up at Lisa’s in the end) but for right now, I’m just devastated. And, maybe, a tiny bit hopeful.

Peace or Freedom?

Supernatural - Season 4 Review

The marathon continues! I have now finished Season 4 and due to popular demand (and because I have way too much to say) I will be doing the 4, 5 and 6 season reviews separately instead of as a group. Lets take a ride shall we?

What really hit home in Season 4 were the parallels to 2 of my very favorite shows: Buffy the Vampire Slayer and its spinoff, Angel. (Duh. Positive I'm not the first here). Not that the similarities hadn't occurred to me before. Good versus Evil. Monster of the week with a Big Bad waiting in the wings. But it's more this season. Some of it is the 38 minutes of hilarity followed by 2 minutes of emotional hell. Joss was always so good at that. It always makes for the most memorable pieces of television. Who doesn't want to float on the clouds and then crash violently to earth? Maybe it's also Dean's coming back from the dead. Having to make those impossible decisions. You or the world? Your loved ones or some random stranger? Can you do the job you set out to do? Is it worth giving up everything? Who do you trust? Do you even trust yourself? Why you? How far are you willing to go? And these parallels might upset people who will make accusations of copy catting but it really just makes me love this show even more. Buffy and Angel are over (on the screen anyways) but that doesn't make this kind of story telling any less mesmerizing. These themes will always be alive and well in our culture and I am just thankful that I have happened upon so many great tellings of them. We all need heroes. Especially the messy kind.

"Lazarus Rising" - 4x1: Another Buffy moment for me. Dean digging his way out of his grave. He seemed to adapt a little faster though. Dove right into the junk food and porn. That's the Dean we know and love. The hug he and Sam shared nearly knocked me out of my chair. I felt it in my soul. Also, nice to finally meet Castiel and Genevieve Cortese (who we know becomes Genevieve Padalecki) as the new Ruby. I'd known about both of them prior to watching but it was nice to get some context.

"Are You There God? It's Me, Dean Winchester" - 4x2: This episode reminded me of a Buffy episode as well. "Conversations With Dead People" from Season 7. Each of the characters dealing with their own personal demons through a fight with a monster. I also love Dean's crisis of faith now that he personally knows an angel. "I thought angels were supposed to be guardians. Fluffy wings. Halos. You know, Michael Landon, not dicks."

"In the Beginning" - 4x3: Loved the Back To The Future parallels! Loved learning more about their family history. Hunting really is in their blood.

"Metamorphosis" - 4x4: "I've seen big weird, little weird, weird with crazy on top." One of my fave Dean quotes only because it's so applicable to the crap I have witnessed within the fandoms I live in. Scary people are scary! I was so moved by Sam's efforts to help this guy. Because maybe if this guy was a monster and could live a normal life, so could the monster Sam believes he is.

"Monster Movie" - 4x5: Loved that the brothers Winchester seemed back to themselves after so much stress regarding Dean's return and Sam's "activities." Loved the black & white take. Dean said the word hymen like 10 times. Fantastic. See also the Kiss of the Week.

"Yellow Fever" - 4x6: OMG The Scream. I nearly choked from laughing so hard. And then his rant; "And you… you're gassy. You eat half a burrito and you get toxic!" Seriously fraking hilarious. I delighted in seeing this side of Dean. Oh, and the song "Eye of the Tiger" has been forever altered in my mind. Thank you Jensen Ackles for this shining moment!

"It's the Great Pumpkin, Sam Winchester" - 4x7: Living where I do, it was nice to hear some accurate Halloween lore. That stuff is always so interesting to me. Loved Dean standing up to the angels. That Uriel is such a dick.

"Wishful Thinking" - 4x8: I seriously thought this episode was going to kill me. That entire business with the Teddy Bear was too much. I am still cracking up over it: "How do we even know that's gonna work? I mean I don't want some giant, flaming, pissed-off teddy on our hands." And then Dean is honest with Sam about Hell for the first time. And though he won't share specifics, I'm upset just thinking about it.

"I Know What You Did Last Summer" - 4x9: Sam comes clean (mostly) about what Dean missed while in Hell. I could not have been more broken hearted about his trying to get Dean back. And while half of me loves when they scream at each other (the raw emotion is enough to swallow anyone whole) the other half of me hates it so much. I also want to thank Sam for "too much information." I've said it before, Supernatural doesn't do a whole lot of love or sex but when they do it they do it so right. Holy Hotness Batman. Please tell me I'm not the only one who watched this more than a few times. No wonder the actors got married. They almost had to after that public display. WOW.

"Heaven and Hell" - 4x10: I have 2 things from this episode I want to comment about. Remember when I said 6 seconds ago that this show knows how to do sex? Um... Yeah. Boy do they. I cannot believe they showed this on The CW. Seriously. YOU GUYS! He removed her pants and separated her legs and crawled between them. My jaw was on the frickin floor, drool just pouring out. Mostly thanks to one of the hottest backs I have ever seen in my life (thanks again Sandi!) Lord. Have. Mercy.

The other thing about this episode that I need to bring up (which reminds me of a certain Angel Season 5 basement:
Dean: They... they sliced and carved and tore me in ways that you... Until there was nothing left. And then suddenly, I would be whole again. Like magic. So they can start all over. And Alastair, at the end of every day... every one, he would come over and he would make me an offer... to take me off the rack if I put souls on... If I started to torture. And every day I told him to stick it where the sun shines. For thirty years I told him. But then I couldn't do it any more, Sammy... I couldn't. And I got off that rack, God help me, I got right off and I started ripping them apart. I lost count of how many souls. The... the things that I did to them...
Sam: Dean.... Dean, look, you held up for thirty years. That's longer than anyone would have
Dean: How I feel. This... inside me... I wish I couldn't feel anything, Sammy. I wish I couldn't feel a damn thing.
****
I can't even write about it without my body shaking with sobs and feeling like my guts are being tied in knots. I cannot handle Dean's tears (they are just as bad if not worse than Stefan Salvatore's tears). It's too much. The guilt and the shame. To carry that with you. Every. Day. It's too much.

"Family Remains" = 4x11: A devastating story. The most devastating of it all though was Dean. Again. "I enjoyed it Sam. They took me off the rack, and I tortured souls, and I liked it. All those years, all that pain, finally getting to deal some out yourself, I didn't care who they put in front of me. Because that… that pain I felt, it just slipped away. No matter how many people I save, I can't change that. I can't fill this hole, not ever."

"Criss Angel Is A Douchebag" - 4x12: The title of this episode is a giant win. I also liked that they said the word "douche" about 90 times.

"After School Special" - 4x13: Those shorts! That sweat band! "Take a lap!" "Walk it off!" *DEAD* Funny Gym Teacher Dean aside; poor Sam. He wanted so badly to be normal but he was just always different. Even as a grown up hunter, still such a little boy. Poor Sammy.

"Sex and Violence" - 4x14: "Strippers, Sammy. Strippers! We are on an actual case involving strippers. Finally!" Loved seeing Jim Parrack who plays Hoyt Fortenberry on True Blood. Hate what he did to my boys. That fight. Ouch. As Scarlett O'Hara's Mammy once said: "It makes my blood run cold, the things they say to one another."

"Death Takes a Holiday" - 4x15: "Floored by the Lord.com bloggers" LMFAO!! I hated that the boys could not get past their fight, hard as they tried. And I was sad for Pamela. She only ever wanted to help.

"On the Head of a Pin" - 4x16: I tweeted this as I was watching but I must reiterate: I need new pants every time Dean uses his angry voice. Good God. And Uriel always brings Angry Dean. Glad he finally got his. My poor Dean though. To have to relive that Hell. To learn what he did. Torture is such a gray area. It shouldn't be, but it is. And not just because I'm torn between thinking he's hot doing it (that Alastair fucker is creepy and deserved all of it) and hating that he has to do it at all. I hate that it has changed him. But he's not the only one who has changed. It's been the underlying theme of the entire season. Dean is not the same old Dean (because of Hell and all) and Sam is not same old Sam either because (SURPRISE!) he's been drinking demon blood. Oh Sam.

"It's a Terrible Life" - 4x17: I have witnessed a lot of scary ass shit watching this show but nothing is scarier than Corporate Dean. Parted hair? Shirt and tie? Talk radio? SALAD?? *shudder* And Corporate Dean thinking Corporate Sam is hitting on him? BAHAHAHAHA!!! The lesson from all of this? Dean can't be done. He has to do what he does. He has no choice. It's Buffy all over again. And it's heart crushing.

"The Monster at the End of This Book" - 4x18: I have only this to share. Absolutely brilliant!
Dean: There's Sam girls and Dean girls. And what's a slash fan?
Sam: As in... Sam slash Dean. Together.
Dean: Like... together together?
Sam: Yeah.
Dean: They do know we're brothers, right?
Sam: It doesn't seem to matter.
Dean: Ah, come on. That's... that's just sick.

"Jump the Shark" - 4x19: I am so glad they only had a brother for like 5 minutes. That would have been so annoying. This is the book of Sam and Dean. Not Sam, Dean and Adam. Blech.

"The Rapture" - 4x20: Sam is cranky. that's what happens to addicts who don't get what they want. Damn it Sam. Really enjoyed getting more Castiel/Jimmy back story. Though considering what happened to Jimmy, makes me kinda glad I don't pray that much.

"When The Levee Breaks" - 4x21: I'm incapable of describing the sob fest I had watching this episode. From start to finish. What is it with brothers on The CW locking each other up? And while I always know it's for the best, it doesn't make it any easier. Sammy may as well have stuck a spork in my heart. That's how it felt watching him go through his withdrawals. I wanted to hug him and run away from him at the same time. And then their fight. I know a dozen of you will say I have cheered on their screaming matches in the past. And I have. Because it shows the depth of their devotion. But this. This was so bad. What Dean called Sam. The tears in both of their eyes. You guys I was SOBBING.

"When The Levee Breaks" - 4x22: THAT FUCKING BITCH!! I wanted so bad for her to be good. I really really wanted it. Even when I knew that wasn't the case. And I KNEW it! She said it herself when they first got it on: "Because it's wrong and it's bad and we shouldn't." Dean was right. What good could EVER come from drinking the blood of a Demon? But I also knew Dean would NEVER give up on him. No matter what he had done. Sam's "I'm Sorry" was a killer. Of course he was sorry. Poor Sam. And now both of them have played their part in bringing on the apocalypse. An apocalypse only they can stop. *SOB* Those angels seem like total dicks if you ask me.

Before I end the sequel to War and Peace ( DAMN THIS POST IS LONG! RIGHT?) I have to give a shout out to Bobby Singer. I absolutely love this character. ADORE this character. I was crazy about Jim Beaver on Deadwood and am so glad to see him have such an irreplaceable role on Supernatural. He has been more than a father figure to the boys. They owe him a seriously nice fruit basket.

Lucifer is having a coming out party. What comes next?? So excited for Season 5! If you have made it this far in my novel (SO SORRY!) please leave comments! Love sharing the #SPN love with you all!

*credit for all screencaps goes to http://caps.oxoniensis.org/spncaps.html